{"id":38024,"date":"2025-10-10T14:28:06","date_gmt":"2025-10-10T11:28:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/when.org.gr\/?p=38024"},"modified":"2026-04-21T17:22:22","modified_gmt":"2026-04-21T14:22:22","slug":"when-on-topic-new-mom-old-mum-caring-for-the-elderly-in-our-personal-and-professional-lives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/when.org.gr\/en\/when-on-topic-new-mom-old-mum-caring-for-the-elderly-in-our-personal-and-professional-lives\/","title":{"rendered":"WHEN on Topic: New mom, old mum: Caring for the elderly in our personal and professional lives"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<div class=\"text\">\n    <h6 style=\"text-align: center;\">WHEN on Topic: Mom, you&#8217;re getting older: Caring for the elderly in our personal and professional lives<\/h6>\n<p><strong>Care<\/strong> is usually associated with children and their upbringing. But what happens when this care turns backwards \u2013 towards our <strong>parents, elderly relatives, patients, or people with disabilities<\/strong>? How do we manage such a demanding period of life when, at the same time, we also have demanding jobs, children, relationships, and personal needs? And how does this affect the way we care and the way we work?<\/p>\n<p>In this episode of <strong>WHEN on Topic<\/strong>, we talk with <strong>Michalis Bozos, Country Manager at a multinational company<\/strong> in the field of cybersecurity, who openly shares his personal experience of <strong>caring for his mother through a long and difficult period<\/strong>. How does <strong>caring<\/strong> for our parents, people with disabilities, or loved ones with chronic illness <strong>change our lives, our work, and the way we see so many things<\/strong> both within ourselves and around us?<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In the fifth episode of the WHEN on Topic series, which is carried out within the framework of the CAREdiZO project, we ask:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How do we <strong>balance<\/strong> <strong>work and the needs<\/strong> of a loved one who cannot care for themselves?\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How do we manage the different \u201c<strong>fronts<\/strong>\u201d that demand our care?\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Does the support of those who need us carry a <strong>gender dimension<\/strong>?\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And, ultimately, how can we better support <strong>women and men<\/strong> who enter such a phase of life\u2014as employers, managers, partners, and\u2014why not?\u2014as children?\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">An episode about <strong>adult care<\/strong>, about <strong>vulnerability<\/strong> and <strong>resilience<\/strong>, about <strong>human relationships<\/strong> inside and outside the workplace, and about the <strong>importance<\/strong> of remembering that we are not (and do not need to be) alone.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-rich is-provider-spotify wp-block-embed-spotify wp-embed-aspect-21-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe title=\"Spotify Embed: WHEN On Topic: \u039c\u03b1\u03bc\u03ac, \u03b3\u03b5\u03c1\u03bd\u03ac\u03c2: \u03b7 \u03c6\u03c1\u03bf\u03bd\u03c4\u03af\u03b4\u03b1 \u03c4\u03c9\u03bd \u03b7\u03bb\u03b9\u03ba\u03b9\u03c9\u03bc\u03ad\u03bd\u03c9\u03bd \u03c3\u03c4\u03b7 \u03b6\u03c9\u03ae \u03ba\u03b1\u03b9 \u03c4\u03b7 \u03b4\u03bf\u03c5\u03bb\u03b5\u03b9\u03ac \u03bc\u03b1\u03c2\" style=\"border-radius: 12px\" width=\"100%\" height=\"152\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen allow=\"autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; fullscreen; picture-in-picture\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/embed\/episode\/0XWVbQzpBymK8DkVZwdbB6?utm_source=oembed\"><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n<section id=\"nvm-faq-block_dc3ab6210db2b31fb60b3efa707aaa63\" class=\"nvm-faq alignfull\">\r\n    <div class=\"panel panel-width-normal\">\r\n        <div class=\"row small-align-self-center\">\r\n                                        <div class=\"small-column-100 laptop-margin-10 laptop-column-80 small-align-self-center\">\r\n                    <div class=\"faq-wrapper\">\r\n                        <h2 class=\"title color-onyx\">Read the Podcast!<\/h2>\r\n                                                    <div class=\"faq-container\">\r\n                                                                    <div class=\"responsiville-accordion\">\r\n                                        <div class=\"responsiville-accordion-panel\">\r\n                                            <div class=\"responsiville-accordion-header color-onyx\">\r\n                                                WHEN on Topic - Episode 5 | New mom, old mum: Caring for the elderly in our personal and professional lives                                            <\/div>\r\n                                            <div class=\"responsiville-accordion-content\">\r\n                                                <div class=\"text\">\r\n                                                    \n<div class=\"text\">\n    <p><b>Introduction<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Welcome to the new season of WHEN On Topic. I\u2019m Stella Kasdagli, and I\u2019m back with you to discuss women\u2019s professional and economic empowerment and equality at work. Sometimes even outside of it. This season of our podcast is dedicated to caregiving responsibilities and their equal distribution, and it comes to you thanks to CAREdiZo. What is \u201cCAREdiZo?\u201d It\u2019s a new project we\u2019re involved in as part of the European Commission\u2019s \u201cCERV\u201d programme, which aims to bridge the gender gap in caring responsibilities by promoting equality practices at home, in micro businesses, and small civil society organizations with up to ten employees. This project promotes family-friendly policies, encourages men to participate in caregiving, and highlights the value of caregiving across society, which is what we have been aspiring to for so long. Its activities include research, co-creation workshops, training programmes, and the development of digital tools, such as an educational game, for example, but also podcasts to fight stereotypes and promote equality. Our partners are based in Cyprus, Lithuania, and Bulgaria and are currently creating their own podcasts, which you might have the chance to explore soon.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: In this episode of When On Topic, we are turning our attention to the issue of care, not so much about children this time, but for the adult members in our families who, at some point and for any reason, may need our care, both practical and beyond: parents, older relatives, people living with illness, and of course, people with disabilities. With us today is a man who recently took on such a role in his own life, and together we\u2019ll talk about whether caregiving carries a gendered dimension, how it affects not only our professional lives but also our personal ones, and how we can effectively support those entering this stage of life &#8211; as friends, as relatives, as employers, and as managers. Michalis Bozos is joining us today, a Country Manager at a multinational company working in the field of cybersecurity. I\u2019ll let him tell us himself how he came to be part of today\u2019s episode. Michalis?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Good morning Stella. I found myself in this situation due to my mother\u2019s health conditions. I went through a rather lengthy caregiving process that lasted about two to three years, with the last two years being much more intense than the previous ones. The whole care she needed stretched over for approximately twelve years. Things gradually got worse every passing year, reaching their peak in those final two years. At that point, it truly required much closer attention and a greater commitment of my time to help her manage the challenges she was facing.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Tell us a bit about the broader context. Do you have children? Do you have siblings?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes, I have a sister, one year older than me, and we share the same concerns when it comes to our parent\u2019s health. At the same time, I have two children &#8211; a 17 &#8211; year &#8211; old son and a 12 &#8211; year &#8211; old daughter\u2014and my partner, with whom I live and share my life. And within all of that, I have a job that is quite demanding.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: That\u2019s what it sounds like.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: First of all, having to manage four different countries and the people in each one of them, all together it created a strong mix of demands on my time.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Michalis, let me take a step back and ask you: when you were growing up, if you think back to your childhood, what were the role models or care models that you had around you? In other words, when you found yourself in this situation, based on what stimuli and what memories you were able to see yourself in the role of caregiver for your parent?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Look, that\u2019s an interesting point, because if I go back to the family issues my parents had to deal with, my father\u2019s father &#8211; so my grandfather on that side- had died before my father even knew him, so I have no memory of him. My grandmother, also on my father\u2019s side, passed away when I was ten. I don\u2019t remember much, other than that my father would go to the hospital several times a day, and sometimes my grandmother was at home in very poor condition.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: That\u2019s also a caregiving memory as well.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Very vague indeed, nothing very concrete. What I recall more from my mother\u2019s side, from her parents, was first of all the experience with my grandfather, who spent four years bedridden with a severe case of Alzheimer\u2019s. It began almost like a joke and ended as a tragedy. As I think is often the case with Alzheimer\u2019s: at first you forget something and everyone laughs, and then, in a very short time, you find yourself confined to a bed, unable to do anything. He was otherwise very strong physically, which kept him alive much longer. That story, of course, was carried far more by my grandmother than by my mother. My grandmother was utterly dedicated\u2014a woman on a mission, as they say\u2014to keeping my grandfather alive for as long as needed, or as long as possible, wanting to have him by her side. After my grandfather died, my grandmother passed away very quickly. Within a year, we barely had time to realize what had happened.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: That mission was clearly very important to her.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes. She became ill after a routine heart operation. She never recovered and passed away soon after. It wasn\u2019t really a situation that required long-term care &#8211; she went into the hospital once, then again a second time, and then she was gone. It all happened very fast. What I can tell you, though &#8211; and it left a mark on me, even if it strays a bit from the subject of caregiving itself &#8211; is that she passed away in my arms. As, in the end, so did my mother after the period of intensive care we\u2019ll be talking about.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I don\u2019t think that strays from the subject at all, because, you know, the moment we die is also a stage of life, and one in which care is very much needed. So I think what you describe is very relevant. I\u2019ll come back later to the distinction you made between your father\u2019s side and your mother\u2019s side &#8211; which may reflect gender roles, or it may simply be coincidence. But for now, I\u2019d like to move to the more recent past. How did you experience this extended period of caregiving in relation, first of all, to your professional life &#8211; which, as we said, is demanding, and I imagine also rewarding, not something you do just because you have to?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I\u2019ll tell you. I believe I was &#8211; and still am &#8211; fortunate in my work environment, because it gives me the flexibility to manage such situations. Thanks to the multinational nature and structure of the company, I don\u2019t really face obstacles in arranging my own schedule. I set my own program, I manage my own responsibilities. Of course, that also came with a very human response from the people I approached in the company to whom I explained my situation, the possibility that I might be absent from some daily activities, and they showed great concern and were very generous in giving me all the time I needed. I missed out on important things &#8211; corporate obligations, business trips, relationships with clients and partners, and many activities. But beyond the way the company itself handled my situation, I also had a team that supports the day-to-day work and I\u2019m proud of this team which was built in such a way that it functions autonomously, without needing me to be present all the time. That gave me the flexibility I needed.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Do you think that flexibility was mainly due to company policies and culture, or was it also related to your position?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Both. That is, being a general manager comes with many responsibilities and obligations, but also a great deal of freedom. If, over time, you build your team in a way that trust develops and those freedoms are in place, then those teams can operate completely on their own. I think that\u2019s very important. In my view, any manager should be able to organize their team so it functions independently without them. If there\u2019s a constant need for the director or manager to be present, then something isn\u2019t right &#8211; or at least that\u2019s how I see it, given my own mindset about work. So yes, it was both the company\u2019s policies and my position, as well as the structure of the teams in each country, that allowed me the flexibility I really needed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Do you feel that other members of your team could have had the same flexibility? And if not, what would you do differently as a manager to ensure that others, without your position, could also benefit from similar support from the company they work for?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Everyone can have that flexibility, because we can create a plan that covers each other\u2019s gaps. We try to avoid creating exclusive dependencies.Although we are a small team, &#8211; especially in Greece there are, let&#8217;s say, twelve people &#8211; each person has a specific role to play. On the other hand, a colleague recently found himself in a similar situation. Unfortunately, his father passed away just this past Saturday. He had been absent for two months. Essentially absent, although he did show up occasionally at the office. I believe he took, and is still taking, all the time he needs to recover, which is challenging. Because it&#8217;s not just the period of care, but also the time after that, the time you need for yourself afterward. Even during the caregiving period, he had all the freedom he really needed. Though in a slightly different way from mine, of course, because at some point, there was a conversation that went like this: &#8220;You know what, you&#8217;ve been away for quite a while, you should probably take some proper leave for the time you&#8217;ve been away,&#8221; which I didn&#8217;t do.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes. Do you feel that your own experience informed how you acted as a manager in this case?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">:\u00a0 Definitely. First of all, it gave me both experience and sensitivity. Experience to understand what someone going through such a situation really needs &#8211; how sleepless they might be, the worries they carry, trips to the hospital, waiting for calls, doing everything required for the person they\u2019re caring for. And sensitivity for their family &#8211; the children, partner, spouse, anyone connected to them. Which, from experience, I understood what needs to be done. Beyond that, the sensitivity that I developed through my own experience, I think, made me a bit more empathetic toward these situations. Even so, I believe that even without this experience, I would have approached it in roughly the same way. It\u2019s a matter of character.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: You mentioned the rest of the family, which was going to be my next question. We talk about balancing caregiving and work, but caregiving occurs in different areas of our lives &#8211; our parents, our children, our relationships, and ourselves. How did you experience the tension, the imbalance, and the competing needs among these different areas in your own case?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Look, there are two things that come to mind spontaneously. One is the time you spend caring for someone &#8211; and that time is inevitably taken from everything else. These include work, which we discussed earlier, but also your family and children, your friendships, and everything else that surrounds us. I think that I became quite antisocial during that period, and I don\u2019t think it could have been any other way. In other words, you don&#8217;t have time to do other things. I might not have had time to see my children during the day, or my partner. Relationships start to feel a bit transactional: \u201cDo this,\u201d \u201cDo that,\u201d \u201cI\u2019ll do this,\u201d \u201cYou\u2019ll do that.\u201d It\u2019s not beautiful; it\u2019s a bit mechanical. But I felt that I always had someone, my partner, who would support me whatever decision I made about how to spend my time and energy. I don\u2019t have exactly the same expectations from my underage children, but I felt they were very understanding and resilient, realizing that dad was away from home. Dad didn\u2019t sleep at home today, nor tomorrow, nor the day after.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Not at all.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Not at all. And he may be nervous at the moment because he&#8217;s suffering from insomnia, or he may be emotionally charged with countless things. In other words, the fact that they might come home from school and see me crying on the balcony, for example, was not easy for them, but they showed considerable resilience. I feel that my partner did the same, choosing her own path. It was a conscious path that she chose herself, maintaining some distance from my drama. Because, at the end of the day, someone had to be more resilient in the situation we were living in. And yes, my family is my father, who remains my father, but my family now is my children and my partner. So that&#8217;s where I want to put the most emphasis in my life going forward.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Overall, what do you feel this process, with all its challenges and burdens, has given you? What did it teach you, what did you gain, and how did it enrich you?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I was enriched, but also got hurt. Many things happened. Look, for me,\u00a0 after an intensive period of caregiving, there was also loss- which isn\u2019t always the case. That is, someone might go through a period of intense care and then life continues normally. For me, loss came too. That weighs on you alongside the caregiving process. I can\u2019t say I\u2019ve fully processed it &#8211; it\u2019s all very recent &#8211; but what I felt was that, by taking charge of many things, resolving situations, facing momentary decisions or decisions that needed to be made for someone else\u2019s life, it gave me a sense of strength: that I can function under difficult circumstances and difficult moments. A clear example was last summer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: These things usually happen in the summer..<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Usually, yes. All these difficult events happened in the summer because, as I said, after 12 years of medical problems, which had become much more intense in the last 2-3 years, the turning points were in the summer. Even illnesses usually break out at night.\u00a0 These are awkward moments that you have to manage.\u00a0 For me, it was summers. One surgery, one metastasis, something new each time. So last summer we found ourselves in the most difficult situation of the whole journey. The summer journey, because then came an even more difficult period when decisions had to be made quickly. Because, as selfish as it may sound, we also have our families and had already planned our summer vacations, as we mentioned before. And somehow all this had to&#8230;\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Let the rest of your family work as well.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: For it to work, yes. So, within a very short period of time, all the things that had to be done were done. Surgeries, treatments, finding someone at home for 24-hour care. Which is difficult, right? I mean, anyone who is trying right now to find home care for their loved ones &#8211; whether that\u2019s for babysitting or for parent-sitting &#8211; I think it\u2019s especially hard. I was lucky in that as well. I found a lady who bonded very much with the family, with my father and mother, and helped a lot. She was really a gem, found by chance, through a simple, random search. So, during a very intense period when everything had to be taken care of, in the end, everything was taken care of. And somehow, I felt like I functioned a bit like a project manager, let\u2019s say, putting aside a lot of the emotional aspects at the moments when things had to get done. But afterward, you can\u2019t really hide those feelings. At some point, they overwhelm you, and you say: well, at least I managed. I went on my vacation, and I took care of my mother too.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: That\u2019s important, in order to be able to manage the things that come up.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes, because I think that you also need a bit of time. Everyone who goes through this needs to be able to take their time, to recharge their batteries, to refill their energy so they can carry on. Because when you\u2019re in the red zone for a long time, I think that\u2019s when you can hit a dangerous point: you can collapse yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I\u2019ll hold onto what you said as the starting point for my next question, which is this: in reality nobody prepares us for this phase of caregiving- we tend to know more about parenthood, but much less about caring for the adult members of our family who will eventually need care. So, what advice would you give to a friend of yours (male in this question), an acquaintance &#8211; and I\u2019m intentionally using the masculine here- who comes to you and says: \u201cMy parents have started having difficulties,\u201d and you realize he\u2019s entering this stage where greater care on his part will be required. What would you share, both practically and emotionally, perhaps?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b><\/b><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Emotionally speaking, the clich\u00e9 that you \u201chave to be strong\u201d does turn out to be true. Once you step onto this path, you start approaching things more like tasks to be managed, as I mentioned earlier. You almost have to see it that way &#8211; more practically, even a bit coldly- reminding yourself, \u201cI\u2019m doing this to help,\u201d and setting aside some of the emotional weight so you can function better.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I didn\u2019t ask for psychological support during that period. I tried it afterwards, but ended up rejecting it. That\u2019s actually something I\u2019d strongly encourage anyone in a similar situation to seek out, and I think it was a mistake on my part not to stick with it. Talking things through, getting what\u2019s inside you out, and maybe receiving some guidance can make a big difference.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As a friendly piece of advice, I\u2019d say: keep your mind clear, get as much sleep as you can, and take whatever moments of rest are available. When you have the chance to be calm, be calm. When you have the chance to feel happy, let yourself be happy. Don\u2019t let the process &#8211; whether it drags on or ends up being shorter &#8211; cast a shadow of gloom over everything.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: In everything.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I believe you need to take everything life brings, because it\u2019s all part of life. Looking after your parents, caring for someone who depends on you &#8211; that\u2019s also part of life. On the practical side, though, I think the whole process does require some outside help. I don\u2019t know who has siblings and who doesn\u2019t, but I was fortunate to have my sister, who lives close to my parents and could also help, as much as she was able. So I can\u2019t say I took it all on myself. I didn\u2019t carry that whole weight alone. And my father was there too. Some decisions were made together, and it was a shared effort.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: If that\u2019s not the case, then you definitely need some other kind of support network.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: And even then, we always need to keep in mind something &#8211; at least this is how it was for me with my mother: I was her child, and she was my mother. I\u2019m not a nurse, not a caregiver, not a professional in that field &#8211; and I wouldn\u2019t want to be either. I have my own professional and personal life. What we had was the mother\u2013child relationship, and it\u2019s good for it to remain that way. The practical aspects of care are best handled by people who are trained for it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: If that\u2019s afffordable.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes, if that\u2019s possible, of course. Whether that means a doctor, a nurse, home care, or something else. There are people who are specialists in this. But of course, another issue comes up: the cost.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes, that\u2019s why I said \u201cif it\u2019s possible.\u201d Because for many people, that\u2019s not necessarily an option.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Right. And the cost is high. So another piece of advice I\u2019d give to someone who sees this stage coming is to be a little proactive and start looking into it earlier than strictly necessary. Because once the need is really there, you\u2019ll end up doing what I did. Making rushed decisions and grabbing the first opportunity that comes along, regardless of the cost. In that moment of need, you may even end up paying more.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: That\u2019s important.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes, because the longer a situation like this lasts, the more it can weigh heavily on a family and its budget. And it\u2019s not something the state helps with &#8211; at least not the Greek state.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Some states do.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Yes, that\u2019s why I am saying this. The Greek state at least doesn\u2019t provide any support, it doesn\u2019t recognize this need. Or at least, from what I looked into, I didn\u2019t find any such option. Of course, maybe someone listening could say, \u201cNo, there is this program you can use, or that policy you can take advantage of.\u201d I didn\u2019t see anything like that. These were expenses I had to shoulder together with my family.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I w\u03bfuld like to pause here, because this brings us to the distinction between formal, professional care and the informal care that happens within families. And that leads me to my final question. It\u2019s not a coincidence that we asked a man to join us today. You\u2019ve mentioned your mother, who cared for her parents; your grandmother, who cared for her husband; and the woman who looked after your own mother when she needed it. We know there is a gendered dimension of care. We know that both formal and informal care are most often carried out by women. That might be starting to shift in recent years, but I\u2019d like to hear from your own experience: how do you see people approaching this responsibility &#8211; depending on their gender and other factors &#8211; and how does society\u2019s expectations differ for men and women when they find themselves in a caregiving role? From your perspective, or from your sister\u2019s, or even your partner\u2019s if she faced a similar need in her own family, would gender play a role?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I\u2019m not entirely sure this is strictly a gender issue. There is definitely a part of it that is gendered, especially when it comes to paid care by professionals. And in those cases, it\u2019s overwhelmingly women who take on the role. I actually think they\u2019re at a disadvantage in some ways. \u03a4hey don\u2019t necessarily have the physical strength or stamina to manage the demands of care. But for some reason, it seems to be seen almost exclusively as women\u2019s work: the woman who looks after the grandfather, the woman who babysits the baby, the woman who provides support. We rarely hear of men taking on those roles. That, I think, is a whole different conversation &#8211; one that could fill an entire episode on its own. I can\u2019t say exactly where the roots of it lie. When it comes to childcare, it ties into sensitive issues like the phallic issue, let\u2019s say, and the fear that can arise simply from a man being present with children. I think this is a big issue, something we all carry in the back of our minds. We tend to trust a woman more easily than a man. When it comes to elder care, though, I honestly don\u2019t know why that is. From my own experience &#8211; since you mentioned my mother caring for her parents or my grandmother looking after my grandfather &#8211; I think it often comes down to whose problem it is in the end. When my grandmother on my father\u2019s side got sick, it was my father who took on most of the caregiving. My mother was focused on us. My memories are a bit blurry, since I was quite young, but I clearly remember my father rushing to hospitals, dealing with everything related to my grandmother\u2019s health.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Did he have siblings?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Three brothers.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: So, by necessity.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: I don\u2019t know if it was out of necessity, but yes, there were three brothers, and my father was the one who took on the care. Later, when my mother\u2019s parents became ill, she was the one who cared for them. I think it comes down to that: whose responsibility it\u00a0 seems to be. In other words,\u00a0 I cared for my mother. If my partner\u2019s mother were to fall ill or need support, it would probably be my partner who would step in. So, I don\u2019t know if it\u2019s always as gendered as we think. At least in my circle, and in the cases I\u2019ve seen with friends, I haven\u2019t observed a stark difference based purely on gender. It seems to depend more on whose side of the family the issue belongs to. Because let\u2019s be honest: health problems or care needs in a family aren\u2019t automatically shared problems. They usually fall on the person closest to the one in need. So I\u2019d say it has more to do with that.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Blood ties definitely play a role, and so do family dynamics. But I\u2019d add a footnote here: a family\u2019s awareness and commitment to gender equality makes a big difference. In many of the examples you gave, women aren\u2019t really given a choice &#8211; they simply take on one kind of care or another. For instance, \u201cI won\u2019t care for my husband\u2019s parents, that\u2019s his role, but I\u2019ll still be responsible for the children at the same time.\u201d It\u2019s not that she says, \u201cI\u2019ll focus on my career or my personal life instead.\u201d From what you\u2019ve described, it sounds like in your case too, if your partner had to care for her parents, you would probably take on more responsibility for the children. But in another family, one that\u2019s less conscious about equality, the man might simply continue his job and his daily routine as usual, and the children would end up with a grandmother or a paid carer.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Or, in those situations, the woman ends up reaching a point of nervous\u00a0 or complete breakdown because she\u2019s stretched to the limit.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Exactly.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: She\u2019s looking after the person in need of care while she is still doing all the things she was traditionally and conservatively expected to do in the family: cooking, cleaning, and preparing the kids for school. If those tasks fall solely on her shoulders, then yes, I\u2019d say we have a serious problem.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Stella<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Michalis, thank you so much for everything you\u2019ve shared.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Michalis<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: Thank you too. All the best.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Conclusion<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">: What did you think of what we shared today with Michalis, and what else do you think CAREdiZo could potentially create that would bring us one or more steps closer to equality, both inside and outside of work? We are always here to read and listen to your suggestions, comments, and ideas, so you can follow us on social media, send us an email, leave us a review on Spotify, and, of course, come and meet us at WHEN Hub and let\u2019s continue the discussion so that we can make WHEN and CAREdiZo even better for everyone.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<\/div>                                                <\/div>\r\n                                            <\/div>\r\n                                        <\/div>\r\n                                    <\/div>\r\n                                                            <\/div>\r\n                                                                    <\/div>\r\n                <\/div>\r\n                    <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\n\n\n<div class=\"text\">\n    <p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The WHEN on Topic Podcast is available on all major platforms!<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can listen to all episodes on any platform you listen to your podcasts on \u2013 we are on <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/09iNBpLA8e3zfkAMZBVqyi\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Spotify<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">, <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.buzzsprout.com\/1924253\/listings\/3126301\/edit\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Buzzsprout<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">, <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.google.com\/feed\/aHR0cDovL2ZlZWRzLmxpYnN5bi5jb20vMjQzNDEzL3Jzcw?hl=en-GR\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Google podcasts<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">\u00a0&amp;\u00a0<\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/podcast\/id1496502155\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Apple podcasts<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">, <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.audible.com\/pd\/Women-On-Topic-Podcast\/B09VG1JD3R?\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Amazon music<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">, <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/pca.st\/5qc63x16\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Pocket Casts<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">, <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/podcastaddict.com\/podcast\/3795610\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Podcast Addict<\/b><\/a><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">, <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">and of course on<\/span> <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/blacklemon.tv\/podcasts\/women-topic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b>Black Lemon<\/b><\/a><b>&#8216;s platform<\/b><span style=\"font-size: 1.8rem;\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/caredizo.eu\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">CAREdiZO<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> project is implemented in the framework of the European Commission\u2019s CERV Programme, as a cooperation among the\u00a0 following organisations: Challedu (Greece), WHEN (Greece), MOTERU INFORMACIJOS CENTRAS (Lithuania), NATSIONALNA MREZHA ZA BIZNES RAZVITIE (Bulgaria), Mediterranean Institute of Gender Studies (Cyprus). The project is funded by the European Union. The views and opinions expressed are, nonetheless, solely those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the European Commission-EU. Neither the European Union nor the European Commission is responsible for them. Project code: 101191047 \u2013 CAREdiZO \u2013 CERV-2024-GE.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In this episode of WHEN on Topic, we talk with Michalis Bozos, Country Manager at a multinational company in the field of cybersecurity, who openly shares his personal experience of caring for his mother through a long and difficult period. How does caring for our parents, people with disabilities, or loved ones with chronic illness change our lives, our work, and the way we see so many things both within ourselves and around us?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":18,"featured_media":38026,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[385,460],"tags":[442],"class_list":["post-38024","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nea-en","category-when-on-topic","tag-caredizo-en-2"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>WHEN on Topic: New mom, old mum: Caring for the elderly in our personal and professional lives &#8226; WHEN<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"In this episode of WHEN on Topic, we talk with Michalis Bozos, Country Manager at a multinational company in the field of cybersecurity, who openly shares his personal experience of caring for his mother through a long and difficult period. 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